On Being Brave!

 

Third post of the week!!

Yesterday I went and had a tooth pulled!

This is the first tooth I have ever had pulled (not counting my baby teeth)

I don’t have wisdom teeth and by now I am fairly certain I will not develop them.

Someone commented to me once that you must not be very smart to not have wisdom teeth.

I countered with….

Au Contraire! I must be very smart to not develop teeth that most likely will have to be removed.

But truthfully I have a very little mouth ( I know shocking) so there would never had been enough room.

I was very brave and even had it done with no gas!

Okay actually I am very cheap.

But I really put up and brave and confident front.

Joking with the assistant, smiling and seemingly not having a care in the World.

Finally my point…

When I sat down in the chair they took my blood pressure and to say the least it was quite elevated.

I have what they call White Coat Syndrome.

They say this is very normal and most people do have elevated blood pressure while sitting in their chair.

Actually I don’t think I even realized how nervous I really was.

It made me think … I really put up a pretty good front but there are just some things you can’t fake and blood pressure is one of them. :)

God may not have a blood pressure cuff on my arm but he knows when I am faking, He knows when I am struggling and he knows when things on the outside don’t match with feelings on the inside.

Kind of comforting really not having to be brave in front of God!

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
Psalm 46:1 (NASB)

Have a great Day!

Suz

Frustrated !

 

Why is it when You have something so profound to say….

You just can’t get it out!

Why is it when you  feel the music…..

your actual dance is not near as smooth as you feel it! ( or see yourself doing it)

Why is it when you go to hit the high note…

it comes out just a little flat and forced.

Why is it sometimes the way you think something should be isn’t and there isn’t a darn thing you can do about it!

Feeling just a little frustrated!

Why is it you know you shouldn’t be frustrated but you just can’t shake it!

I guess that’s why you blog about it even though you can’t quite get it out the way you want to.

Well just in case you thought I was perfect you now know I’m not! :)

Thanks for listening!

Say Cheese!

 

I was cleaning out my office cupboards the other day when I came upon some forgotten pictures.

Some pics that I still would like to forget!!!

One was of me in a swimsuit in a Kayak at the lakes, 2001ish.

I not sure who took it…. I am guessing my sis.

Usually I ran ( okay vehemently objected to having my picture taken ) I always said that pictures added 100 pounds to you. HA

This also explains why I have so few of pictures of myself.

But obviously when one is precariously perched in a kayak you are sort of trapped.

So what do you do?

You pose and try to look thinner.

This never really works for me.

Well anyways as I look at this pic it brought back lots of memories of that day.

1. me trying to get in that Kayak

2. me trying to balance that Kayak ( not an easy feat when you weigh in over 300lbs) Talk about tipsy

3. me knowing I had just been had  by having a pic taken of me in……you got it……. my swimsuit.

4. me enjoying some semblance of normalcy as I paddled along trying to ignore my arms and legs cramping up, trying to situate the paddle, trying not to tip over because I knew that there was no way I would ever be able to get back in myself.

5. Me actually getting out of the Kayak. I really am not sure how I did get out! I think it was a roll over!

Okay back to the pic!

I can look at it now and shockingly it really doesn’t bug me. It used to bug me but I am Okay with it now.

I look at in fascination… I look at it in fond remembrance…

She looks happy, She was Happy, She was really fat but she was me and I was happy!

Sometimes I worry that I wasted some of my life by being so fat. But when I look at this pic and I remember, truly remember it isn’t just all the effort normal things like a Kayak ride took.

I remember the fun I had too.

I remember the good times too and I am amazed at what I would try even being 300 plus pounds.

And that makes me smile!

I refuse to be ashamed or embarrassed I was me even then that hasn’t changed!

I am really not sure what the point of this post is.

It is just a post with lots of ramblings of the thoughts that are going through my head just now.

I am going to keep this pic ( unlike the many that got ripped up as soon as I saw them years ago )

It is good to remember and for some reason I have a hankering for a kayak ride just now!

I bet I would enjoy it more this time!

I bet I would still object to having my pic taken.

I bet my Sis would still take it.

I bet I would pose and try to look thin.

I bet I would still look happy!

I bet in 10 years from now I would still look at it in fond fascination!

Oh and here is me in the Kayak….

Slightly cropped…

You didn’t really think I would post full body pic of me in a swimsuit did you…

But besides from having no neck, a bad hair day, and HUGE sunglasses, I was happy!

But trying to look thin just wasn’t happening!

Procrastination!

 

I am a huge procrastinator! Pretty much all around.

I could list tons of examples but if you have been following my blog as of late you probably figured it out. :)

Although I will give you one… Last night I went through a huge basket of “extra socks” The place socks go when I can’t find a match within a couple week time span.

Lets just say some of the loners were to small to fit even me. Tyler my “baby” wears a mens size 12 now. That should give you an idea how long those socks have been there. Although in my defense he is growing fast these days.

As far as my blog procrastination goes I have a few reasons “excuses” too…

1. Been real busy subbing

2. Scale is not moving downward so not a thrill to talk about.

3. Been real busy subbing

4. Started facebook! ( I would love to be your friend )

5. I am lazy, I would rather read blogs than write

6. Not feeling very interesting lately

7. No new recipes or tips to share

8. Not walking outside but I did start Leslie Sansone again.

9. Been really really busy subbing

 

Okay enough I know. But today I checked my comments and my loyal faithful commenter Lisa  was there.

Besides her having some HUGE accomplishments of her own to share she also gave me a few tips and a great new recipe that I can’t wait to try. I am seriously thinking of having her become a guest blogger because that girl is on fire!

Reminds me of someone I used to know! Who knows Maybe I will become reacquainted with her (Okay it’s me) sometime soon!

My best piece of advice for today Is if your jeans are feeling a little tight wear them anyhow, It will be a constant reminder why you don't want to cheat on your diet. (Under no circumstances do you pull out your bigger size) You lay on that bed and zip them up with vigor! (besides they will stretch out in a hour or so anyways) So I’ve heard! :)

That’s all for today!

Suz